Divorce Dish is my monthly advice column specifically focused on issues that arise for the divorced community. It’s offered exclusively on Divorce Force -an online community connecting and empowering those affected by divorce. I will be re-posting snippets of these columns with links to the full text. Enjoy!
Introducing My New Boyfriend To My Kids, How Soon Is Too Soon?
Question: I’ve been dating someone for two months, when I should introduce him to my kids? I’ve been divorced from their dad for over a year and I really like my new guy but I’m not sure if it’s too soon.
Answer: Somewhere between exclusively dating and a year is the sweet spot. Kids are adaptable but as parents, we should tread lightly. Don’t throw unnecessary change in their already divorced littered path. Until you’re sure that your new mate is the only person you want to spend time with, spare your kids. Keep in mind, sparing your kids (keeping your dating life on the down low), takes effort and sacrifice. You can’t text your new man while you’re having family movie night and you can’t plan faux “run-ins” at the park. Your children are savvier than you realize, they can sniff out romance at first whiff. You might not realize you’re acting differently but they know you don’t usually smile and giggle when your phone text dings and you don’t blush when you run into someone who is really just a friend.
So, if you can’t hold back texting, talking and seeing your new beau when you’re with your kids then it’s best to tell them the truth. Don’t lie; losing your kids trust is worse than the reality of a new boyfriend. Whenever you decide to let everyone in on what’s going on, give your kids time (several months), to accept this new situation. Do NOT go straight from hello to hanging out every weekend.
What Are The Rules Of The Dating Game?
Question: I haven’t dated in twenty years; do I still need to wait three days before calling or texting? Is sex still expected after a third date? Help!
Read more here here